Stop Auditioning for Love A February Invitation to Rest in the Love of Christ

February is known as the month of love. Everywhere you look, there are reminders to be chosen, desired, pursued, and validated. But while the world is focused on romantic love, I believe God is inviting many women into something deeper—freedom.

This February, I want to talk about something many women experience but rarely name: auditioning for love.

Most women don’t wake up thinking, I’m going to perform today so someone will love me. It happens quietly. Subtly. It hides behind words like patience, loyalty, understanding, and strength. But underneath those words is often a silent pressure to prove worth, to be chosen, to be kept.

That pressure does not come from God.

Auditioning for love is what happens when we begin to believe love must be earned instead of received. It shows up when we over-give while neglecting ourselves, stay silent about what hurts us, tolerate inconsistency, lower standards, or tie our value to whether someone stays or leaves. Many women don’t even recognize it because it feels normal—especially when self-esteem has been worn down, confidence has been shaken, or worth has been shaped by rejection or abandonment.

But here is the truth that changed everything for me—and can change everything for you:

You never had to audition for the love of Jesus Christ.

Scripture tells us in Romans 5:8 (NLT),
“But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.”

Before you healed.
Before you had it together.
Before you proved anything.

God chose you.

Jesus makes this even clearer in John 15:16 (NLT) when He says,
“You didn’t choose me. I chose you.”

If Christ chose you first, then your worth was never dependent on being chosen by people. And yet, when we forget this truth, we place people in positions they were never meant to hold. Their approval begins to define us. Their rejection begins to break us.

This is where God calls us back.

Stop Auditioning for Love is not just a theme—it is a spiritual reset. It is about dismantling the belief that you must perform to be loved and rebuilding your life on the solid foundation of who you are in Christ.

Throughout this month, we will be doing deep, intentional work. We will talk honestly about rejection, people-pleasing, fear of being alone, and the emotional patterns that cause women to over-function in relationships. We will explore how self-worth, self-esteem, and self-confidence are restored when they are rooted in Christ—not attention, not validation, not relationships.

You will learn how to recognize when you are auditioning and how to stop. You will learn how to receive the love of Jesus Christ—the love that does not fluctuate, does not withdraw, and never required you to prove yourself worthy.

For the first time ever, I will also be hosting a live Question & Answers session, where we will have real conversations, address real struggles, and grow together in truth and grace.

This month is about stepping out of performance and into peace.
Out of striving and into security.
Out of auditioning and into identity.

You do not audition for grace.
You do not perform for mercy.
You do not earn unconditional love.

You receive it.

And once you truly understand that, everything changes.

— Dashonia Marie